Yikes! I’ve been away for Awhile

June 27, 2012 at 10:26 am (Jewelry, Multiple Sclerosis, Trigeminal Neuralgia)

Hello, blogger friends.

I am in a hole — somewhat physical with a little mental thrown into it.   I am fragile right now, and feel like a small wind is all it will take to blow me over.

I am having an MS exacerbation.  My legs do not work 90% of the time, i.e. I drag my right foot and fall if I walk without the aid of a cane.  The left side of my face has drooped, i.e. my left eye is noticeably smaller than my right eye.  I also have vertigo, i.e., I throw up if my world spins without provocation — and it does.

My trigeminal neuralgia is also aggravating — pain that cannot be stopped with even the strongest of meds.

And… I believe I am suffering from something called Hyperhidrosis.  I have to get some more information from my doctors, but my symptoms are these to the T.  At home I carry around a towel to mop myself up.  I am not comfortable in public because the sweats come without warning.  I soak my clothes.  I am embarrassed.

So… I’ve become a temporary hermit.  I like being a hermit.  I love to be in my house, in my happy places, my sewing room, my dining room, surrounded by the things that I love.  I also recognize that this cannot be a permanent solution.

Last night I was watching “What Not To Wear.”  They were dressing a young woman who wore leg braces or was in a wheel chair.  Stacy and Clinton’s honest advice to this beautiful girl was that, while she was trying to blend in, because she used a wheel chair and/or braces, she couldn’t blend.  So, she might as well look her best at all times.  That spoke to me.  I must love myself enough to take care of ME — damn the torpedoes as it were — and press forward.

So… today I must venture to the mall — to AAA to transfer a car title with my darling DannyO.  I am going to put on some make up and head out, even for a few moments before I retreat to my safe place.

I came up with this design for a bracelet

I’ve been attempting to create while working through my physical issues.  I feel like I’m in a drought, but I’ve re-purposed some old jewelry into some beautiful new pieces.

To remind myself to always have joy.

I think these are my favorite repurposed bracelets of this group

Summer Sunshine

I do have hope.  A friend shared with me a few verses of Scripture from Psalms…  “Whom have I in heaven but you?  And earth has nothing I desire besides you.   My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”  Psalms 73:25,26

I will crawl out, but right now I am going to stay in a bit longer and evaluate, heal and grow.

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3 Comments

  1. briana said,

    I’m always stunned by your talent to take the beauty of the natural world and make it more beautiful…one way you are bearing the image of God for sure!
    My limitations are different than yours but present nonetheless. I have two quotes hanging on my cabinets to remind me of what is true. After reading this post, praying for you, God prompted me to share them w/ you here:
    “God specializes in using ordinary people whose limitations and weaknesses make them ideal showcases for HIS goodness and glory.”
    and
    “God is always bigger than the need. Believer that God is bigger than your situation produces passion in your praise.”

    Thanks for choosing to praise Him and persevere.

  2. pillowsalamode said,

    Those are so beautiful! Many blessings as you meet and conquer the challenges of the day. Best, Katherine

  3. Mary Crabtree said,

    Hello, Melodye!
    Just found your blog and am so sorry to hear that you are hurting so right now. I have a friend, Sue Thomas, on whom the tv series was based, who is living with MS as well. She has had great results with taking colloidal silver. You might check out her blog:

    http://walkingwithms.blogspot.com/

    I’m sure she would be happy to talk with you about it. She is a great advocate for living strong with MS, and has a book coming out in August.
    I’ll be praying for you both!
    Mary Crabtree

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